I'm learning the emotional roller-coaster most certainly does not end once you become pregnant.
We went from cautious optimism to feeling good about this pregnancy.
And now I'm starting to freak out about having a baby to care for in six months.
And it's possible I may have had a meltdown last night.
I can't be the only one to feel this way. We've spent so many years trying to get pregnant and that's what occupied my mind. I spent little to no time thinking about what happens when a baby actually shows up - the idea of us finally having a baby seemed so foreign.
Our families have been pestering us about what they can get for the baby - and although it's really sweet of them - I'm just not ready for some of that stuff. We talked about it earlier this week and decided we should start a registry before our parents start buying stuff we don't want. I set one up and added just a few things before I had a near panic attack. I feel like I have no idea what I'm doing and no business doing it.
Morning sickness is finally letting up and I have not felt her moving yet; so I think there's a disconnect in logically knowing I'm pregnant and having any tangible proof. I would assume it makes it more real when I start to feel movement, or at least make it a little harder to be in denial.
I wonder if it will be a little more challenging for us to transition to having a baby after being just the two of us for so long. The one good thing infertility has done is strengthen our marriage and I know together we will figure out this whole expecting a baby thing. Even if it is a bit scary to think about right now.
1 comment:
Your feelings are so normal, it is natural to worry but it is going to be amazing. Things fell into place very easily, I am hopeful that it will be the same for you. I remember shopping for a crib & feeling like an imposter! It should become even more tangible soon! Glad you are feeling better too!
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